A woman made an emotional plea to her father as she shared the heartbreaking reason behind her decision to end her life at the age of 25.
Annaliese Holland, from Adelaide, South Australia, has opened up about her devastating decision to pursue voluntary assisted dying (VAD) after enduring a life filled with chronic pain, illness, and hospital stays.
Diagnosed with autoimmune autonomic ganglionopathy, a rare and terminal neurological disease, Holland has faced years of excruciating symptoms, including nausea, vomiting, and the inability to digest food properly.
For the past decade, she has relied on total parenteral nutrition (TPN), a method that delivers nutrition directly into her bloodstream via an IV.
Her disease, which causes the body to attack its own autonomic nervous system, left her unable to digest food and battling severe complications, including repeated life-threatening infections that led to sepsis 25 times.
Annaliese Holland chose to die at age 25. Credit: GoFundMe
A rare diagnosis and terminal prognosis
Holland’s battle to understand her illness culminated when she turned 18 and transitioned from pediatric care to an adult hospital.
It was only then that doctors diagnosed her with autoimmune autonomic ganglionopathy. At the age of 22, she received the devastating news that her condition was terminal.
The medications made her bones so fragile that she's had multiple fractures, and she struggled with necrosis, where blood flow to her bones has been compromised, leading to discolored teeth and tooth loss.
Despite these severe physical tolls, the pain has remained a constant presence in her life.
"You can’t change it, so you have to just deal with it, really. Even though there are beautiful moments in my days, they are exhausting and long. I’m in chronic debilitating pain," she said, cited by The New York Post.
“Everyone’s life is moving, and I’m just stuck. I’m not living. I’m surviving every day, which is tough,” she added.
A heartbreaking decision to end it all
After spending her 18th and 21st birthdays in the hospital, Holland reached a breaking point.
At 25, she made the painful decision to end her life on her own terms through voluntary assisted dying, a legal option in Australia for those with terminal illnesses who wish to end their lives on their own terms.
“Life for me now is getting up each day, doing what I need to do medically, taking the painkillers, trying to get through the day, just to go to bed and do it all again,” she said. “I have the most incredible team of doctors and nurses who have watched what I have been through, and I told them I don’t want this anymore.”
Her choice to pursue VAD is not without its emotional toll on her family. While her mother, Armanda, still holds out hope for a miracle, she knows the reality of her daughter’s condition.
However, it was her father, Patrick, who struggled the most with her decision.
A father’s heartbreaking acceptance
Holland recalled a moment with her father in the kitchen where she said: “Dad, I’ve had enough.”
Her father’s immediate response was: “So you’re giving up?” But the turning point came when Holland was revived by doctors after a close brush with death.
“Dad, please let me go. I won’t hate you if you do,” she pleaded through tears. “I told him, ‘If this happens again, I don’t want anything. Please know that in my heart, you letting me go and saying no to treatment… I’m happy with and that’s what I want.’”
Patrick, who has watched his daughter fight through every medical crisis, finally understood. “I don’t know how you do it, but I totally understand that you’ve had enough,” he told her.
Annaliese Holland has multiple organ failure as a result of the condition. Credit: Instagram/Annaliese Holland
After undergoing a three-week evaluation process, Holland was approved for VAD. Though she acknowledged the complex emotions surrounding her choice, she expressed relief.
"It’s one of the bravest things you could ever do, to say I want VAD. It’s not giving up. You’ve had enough and you fought bloody hard,” Holland said.
For the 25-year-old, the decision to end her life offers her a sense of control and peace in the face of constant suffering.
"Knowing I can go when the time is right is just a huge relief. I feel so lucky that I do have this choice," she explained.